Two Men, Two Pits and a Blog

Dodging Tempests: The Voyage of the Cheesy Brat

The first rain drops splattered over the land, and over the shallow waters from whence the White Egrets hunt. In the West, brat5brooding storm clouds have gathered now, sweeping eastward, and strafing the southern tip of the lake from which my bride and I tarry, cradled in our plastic kayaks. We were afloat this local fishery, that, by and far, was a peaceful enough locale, and beautiful too – it’s calm waters reflecting the gray cloud massif advancing slowly over head. As I held my ultra lite fishing rod in hand, gently jigging into the watery abyss, mine eyes could not help but to mind the heavens above, darting to and fro, keen for bright flashes of illumination. For as much as this angler respects a bulging creel, and that is a fine thing indeed, I respect even more so, the zipper-melting mojo of a single bolt of lightning. And I might have thought it my only foe this eve, if it were not for this cheesy discord bloating forth in my belly. Indeed, seems supper, however tasty it might have been, wasn’t to loiter long down in the old plumbing. You’ve all been there. You know from what I mean. Aw well, and even so, good is good, and no less than that was this cheesy brat I tell you. Yum.

Hearken back with me won’t you, and I’ll tell you a little more about it, and how it went and came to be.


Well they look innocent enough. Quick to cook. Easy to perfect. We even toasted the buns in our never-ending quest to be semi-outstanding. But then you all know how to cook a bratwurst. What you might notice different here however, is a wee bit of spiral goofiness going on, of which we can explain.  The working notion, if your up for it, is to take your knife and slice almost, but not quite halfway into the brat, and then kind of twist the meat and guide your knife along, creating a meat slinky of sorts. Anyways, you’ll want to leave about 1/8 inch to 1/4 inch of core so the beast has something to marry itself together with. But the idea here, and the reason for this surgery in the first place is that opening it up as such, will foster more smokey goodness into its fatty bosom. Simple as that. More flavor. More of anything really that you may wish to add. Such as seasonings, or in our case, obscene amounts of melted, cheddar cheese. Oh blimey that cheese!!


Now I love cheese, but every once in a moldy wheel, it is the heady bane of my intestinal existence. And with a tummy in recoil, whilst afloat over populated urban waters, well I don’t mind telling you that I had a favorable gaze fixed on one of them portable plastic outhouses at the boat launch. Specifically the blue and white one, half-draped in the wispy arms of an old willow tree. If I had to, I would lower myself to such means. Oh yes indeed. But just as the storm cloud I had been monitoring so carefully finally slipped out of danger, in that same wonderful moment, likewise did the cheesy turmoil go with it. I don’t know why. And I didn’t analyze it either. Instead an elegant rainbow took stage, sudden like, classic in arc, and pouring brilliantly out of the clouds, as if out of a fountain from heaven itself. Man. When are rainbows not fabulous to behold! Then of course it got even better, as my fishing rod in turn formed a rather nice hoop in it, courtesy of a wiling, large mouth bass. Line tightened, slicing sweetly through the opaque water, the serenade of loon song in the still air, lo, for a while at least, and maybe even longer than that, all my small world was right again. The tempests had passed.

That’s how it works sometimes with storms and belly aches. One minute you think you’ve surely had it, and the next minute you’re pulling fish from the end of a rainbow. Say what ever you will, but there is grace for us all. Amen.

IMG_6368Behold the cheesy bratwurst on toasted bun. Quick and Easy. And may the roll of the lactose dice be ever in your favor.

25 responses

  1. Fan-cheesy-tastic love it when your recipes pop up in my email box, hope you POP are good?

    June 24, 2015 at 3:34 pm

    • Ah, many thanks Marcus. Appreciate that! Hows the new career going? Hope all is well in your world.

      June 24, 2015 at 3:36 pm

      • Slowly….hoping oil picks back up, it’s hard work doing proper BBQ in the catering world…

        June 24, 2015 at 5:13 pm

  2. Outstanding! You just solved the problem of what to prepare during the upcoming Wyoming camp trip. Thanks

    June 24, 2015 at 4:37 pm

    • Ah wow, is it time for the Wyoming trip already? I remember you going there last year too. You live the life mrs Deerslayer !

      June 24, 2015 at 10:38 pm

  3. Man-oh-man that looks so good. One of the only things that we lack down here in paradise is a decent selection of sausages. I get something like brats called, “salchicha aleman” but it just isn’t quite the same and certainly does not come close to the brat selection in any Minnesotan grocery store. Maybe on our trip to the States in July I will buy several different types of brats and have a brats feast. Even if I have to spend some quality time at the banos afterward, it will be worth it.

    Glad things settled down for you and the fishing was good. Have a happy fourth of July, my friend.

    June 24, 2015 at 5:10 pm

    • Many thanks , John. Yeah brats always hit the spot. I’m surprised you don’t have any worthy sausages down there. How can that be? Guess you make up for it with those ginormous shrimp! Man those were some kind of quality. Anyway, have a safe trip, and get your sausage fix in whilst you can! Happy fourth to you and Mary too!

      June 24, 2015 at 10:43 pm

  4. CHEESE!!! I love many types of cheese, but some times they are not nice to my tummy, especially if I partake in too much.
    Brats, ya know, I’ve never had a Brat, really! You surly did them puppies up right, just the way I like ’em, as we say in Hawaii, papa’a (blackened) or paele (burnt bits), MMM

    June 24, 2015 at 5:58 pm

    • Haha, I hear ya about the cheese. It’s good most of the time, but every so often, thy tummy revolts. Its worth it tho. And I cannot believe you’ve never ingested a bratwurst. Surely you kid. You haven’t lived a full life yet Auntiedoni!


      June 24, 2015 at 10:47 pm

  5. Those brats look incredibly good. Great photo’s and delicious food.

    June 24, 2015 at 7:21 pm

  6. This have woken up my brat/hotdog/Italian Sausage beast… Oh my goodness they look good!

    June 25, 2015 at 6:45 am

    • Oh dear…Guess we know whats on your dinner plate in the near future!

      June 25, 2015 at 10:01 am

  7. I hope you were able to put your intestinal yoga to bed w/o too much unwanted fanfare … perhaps you’ve become lactose intolerant in your old age my Smokey Brutha …
    At any rate … Stay hungry 🙂

    June 25, 2015 at 2:05 pm

    • Haha, oh I put it to rest. I refuse to be intolerant of the lacti world. What kind of sad world would that be! No, I like to think I just got ahold of some bad cheese.

      June 25, 2015 at 2:52 pm

  8. I must time my visits to your blog… because they always make me hungry. LOL

    June 25, 2015 at 5:08 pm

    • Good point! The games one must play when reading food blogs. Ah well, there are worse quandaries.

      Have a great weekend, daniheart21!

      June 25, 2015 at 9:31 pm

  9. Awesome. Love the “meat slinky.” In Boston, a few places make hot dogs with cheese and diced onions, which they call “The Fenway.” It’s a little ironic because the actual Fenway franks don’t usually have those fixins. It doesn’t change how good they taste though!

    June 26, 2015 at 6:34 am

    • Ah man I could go for a couple of Fenways right now. I bet they would hit the spot. If I’m ever out there, I’ll have to seek one out. I bet there is a lot of good eating in Boston. Never been there.

      Thanks for chiming in. Always a treat when you do. Here’s to the venerable meat slinky!

      June 26, 2015 at 10:05 am

  10. wwwpalfitness

    Reblogged this on wwwpalfitness and commented:
    Getting hungry

    June 26, 2015 at 7:31 pm

  11. Ahh, and I am relegated to vicariously enjoying such a cheesy repast. But hey, 12 pounds down is ok too. I love what you do here and I’ll be sure to allow myself a splurge of something similar now and again. I just got back from a 3 day fishing extravaganza in our own beautiful sub alpine Sierra lakes. Good times indeed. Hope you are back in the saddle (so to speak).

    June 29, 2015 at 5:26 pm

    • Haha, yes I am, so to speak. Congrats on your 12 lbs, good sir. Now if but to stay the course. Your fishing trip sounds fantastic. Them Sierra parts are beautiful. Least what I’ve seen in photos. You should post up a few choice pictures from your trip. I’d fancy to see them.

      Take care!

      June 29, 2015 at 5:45 pm

  12. I love Cheddarwurst. One of my favorites!

    July 9, 2015 at 6:11 pm

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