Two Men, Two Pits and a Blog

How to Please Your Wife in the 1950’s


The Modified Look


Well, it was one of those evenings where you waddle in through the front door tired and foot sore. It had been a long day afield, and all you want to do is procure a manly beverage and plant your prostate on your favorite man chair and watch some Clint Eastwood. But you can’t. Turns out your wife has had plans for you all day to grill her up some big, juicy cheeseburgers, patron to the pit.

“But darling”, you croak, “I haven’t but one ounce of energy, just let me tarry here in my chair a few hours more!”

Then she gives you a modified version of “the look”. Every man knows the look, but this one is slightly different. It’s the usual, you-better-obey kind of look, but then it’s modified somehow with a droopy, puppy dog face sort of thing going on, and it is all but impenetrable. And so you shrug your shoulders, pull your boots back on, and set off to work again. This, after all,  is the life we pit masters have signed up for. And you got to take it in stride.

“Oh, can you make some ice cream too?” my wife said, batting her eyelashes.


Turns out her supper plans for me were borderline extravagant for a run of the mill weekday night. And before I knew it I had the ice cream maker sitting out at the pit with me, churning away in the dark. That accompanied by the soft, wispy plumes of smoke coming off the charcoal chimney, well, I started to get into my little ambiance there, dug out in the snow. I don’t think I have ever made homemade ice cream on a January evening in Minnesota before, but when your wife says she wants a chocolate shake with her cheeseburger, well a fellow ought to oblige if he can, right? And I could. So I did.

On the note of ice cream, and just to share with you guys, here is our secret ice cream recipe honed through the ages.

Homemade Vanilla Ice Cream

1/2 gallon whole milk

2 cups sugar

1 carton of egg beaters

splash of vanilla extract

Yeah, it’s complicated stuff! Not really, but it surely is delicious, and would make a fine compliment to our cheeseburgers tonight. A brilliant stroke, really.  But it gets even better. Two words…French Fries!


The Crinkle Cutter 

My bride had recently acquired one of these doodleboppers. A little french fry making technology sure to up our game, giving your normal, boring french fry, the crinkled edge often coveted by french fry connoisseurs, such as yours truly. Never used one of these before, but it seemed to do the trick. These spuds were then lowered into a bubbling vat of peanut oil, and deep fried there until golden brown. If you haven’t made your own homemade french fries before, you’re missing out people. And they are not that hard to do either. Anyways, back out to the pit.


The burgers sizzled away like burgers do. And I loitered out there some, I must admit. The night wasn’t as cold as I thought it would be, and the companionship of the coals seemed particularly abiding this eve. Their orange glow, set in a field of frozen white seemed “just right”. And for while at least, I was glad I got up off the couch and made supper like I was told. This was nice. Good to be manning the faithful kettle grill again. Feels like it’s been a while. Near the end of the cook, I flipped the burgers over direct heat for a bit to form a modicum of crust, purely for textural appeal. I knew the fries were nearing their end game too, and the ice cream was ready. The culmination of an wintry evening’s efforts were soon at hand. It was just about time to head inside to our home diner.

The Home Diner Experience


My bride and I are creatures of nostalgia, in particular the 1950’s. Which is odd, because neither one of us even existed in the 50’s. Or the 60’s. Even so, we are smitten for the past. So much so, in point of fact, that we re-created this little 50’s style diner nook just inside the patio door. Purely for fun of it, of course. As much as I like to eat in my man chair by the TV, I knew it would be nostalgic blasphemy not to ingest this meal, “proper like” in the diner. And thus to this end, we did.


Toasted kaiser rolls, fresh tomato slices, lettuce, mayo, ketchup, hark, the works people! Sided with a lovely bouquet of homemade crinkle cut french fries, and a tall, homemade chocolate shake. Glory be! If eating a burger at home gets any better than this, I haven’t heard of it! A top notch culinary experience. And to think, I just wanted to sit on the couch and watch Clint Eastwood. Mercifully, my wife saw the better in me, and she was pleased. Come to think of it, so was I. Amen.



18 responses

  1. AMEN! What a fabulous dinning set, the perfect setting for Burgers & Fries, but could you make my Shake Vanilla, please ? 😉

    January 17, 2017 at 11:14 am

  2. I am a 54 baby and man I am soooooooo jealous of your 50s diner recreation. Absolutely love it! Dinner looked delicious also.

    January 17, 2017 at 1:05 pm

    • Thank you kindly, Mr doubleacres! We do rather enjoy that little homage to a bygone era. It’s good times.

      January 17, 2017 at 2:18 pm

  3. Pingback: How to Please Your Wife in the 1950’s | My Meals are on Wheels

  4. I love your diner. I appreciate an overall theme to a great meal. The burger baskets are a perfect touch. Well done. I have attempted french fries several times but have never been satisfied with the results, but I’m curious about the crinkle cutter. I may have to look into that a bit further. Cheers.

    January 17, 2017 at 9:48 pm

    • Thanks Todd. Yeah, it’s kind of fun. Fun to take a normal old burger and make a bit of a production out of it. My wife made the fries. She seems to have good luck with them, I guess.

      January 18, 2017 at 10:08 am

  5. We love the 50s diner look. What a great idea for a kitchen nook. In many ways we live life sort of like it was lived in the USA in the fifties. (Except with high speed internet, Direct TV, and cell phones) Nice slow pace and easy simple living. Life is good. The burgers looked great!

    January 18, 2017 at 10:22 am

    • Thanks John and Mary. I likewise aspire to such a lifestyle. I wonder sometimes if it was really like that back in the 50’s. Maybe. Every decade had it’s problems I suppose. Anyways, yeah, we enjoy that little diner nook. A pleasant homage that gives us that gooey nostalgic feeling. Yup, and then we check our email on the smartphone. Times have changed…

      January 18, 2017 at 10:43 am

      • For those of us old enough to remember the fifties, Yes it was a more peaceful time. I did not learn about cold wars, nuclear threats, criminals, bullies, drugs, terrorists, aberrant sex preferences, etc, until I went off to college in the sixties. We got our milk in off the front porch, went to chuch on Sundays, kept our doors unlocked, and trusted the government. Then in the seventies, eighties, and nineties (in law enforcement) I learned more than I needed to know. Times have changed, but there is no need for us to change with them. Keep grilling!

        January 18, 2017 at 1:18 pm

      • Amen my friend. Well put!

        January 18, 2017 at 2:11 pm

  6. That’s a pretty natty diner you have there. I love the basket. Pretty authentic stuff.

    January 18, 2017 at 2:57 pm

    • Howdy Conor! Good to see you, ol chap! Yeah, we like to have fun around PotP headquarters. Still figuring out how to decorate it proper like, but the basics are in place. It’s fun.

      January 18, 2017 at 3:36 pm

      • Tile the walls in smaller black and white. You will have to wear a drape coat and brothel creepers. Herself will have to go around the kitchen in a pair of roller skates. That should bring a sense of rock and roll to proceedings. BTW, I only managed to spend 2 years of my life in the ’50’s so I am working from what I read in books!

        January 18, 2017 at 3:51 pm

      • Some deep insights, Conor! I’ll take these into consideration, save for the brothel creepers. Not sure what those are, but I best play it safe..Did such decor and ambiance exist in 1950’s Ireland, or is this stuff just an American thing? Regardless, thanks for the decorating advice. Nicely done!

        January 18, 2017 at 4:28 pm

      • For clarity, the ‘creepers’ are a crepe soled shoe. In the 1950’s, we were too busy trying to feed ourselves to be bothered with fashion. I fake the styling cues from 50’s style diners that abound here in the ‘noughties’.

        January 18, 2017 at 4:32 pm

      • Maybe a small box with connections to the main juke box on the wall in the middle of the table. We used to be able to call up songs on the juke box right from the table with that!

        Have fun!

        January 18, 2017 at 4:05 pm

      • I love that idea! That would fit the theme perfectly. We happened upon one table top juke box in our local nostalgia shop, but as I recall it was more money than we wanted to spend. But that would make a great piece for sure.

        This is nice. Decorating tips coming in from Ecuador and Ireland!

        Blessings to you and Mary!

        January 18, 2017 at 4:32 pm

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